Home > Feeling defeated. And sad.

Feeling defeated. And sad.

August 19th, 2008 at 04:40 am

It's been a bad day. I feel like my bank account is hemmoraghing money, and like the world is designed to get you coming and going.

I wrote earlier about the hot tub being a money pit. Sure, I accept responsibility for that. I will have repair visit No. 3 in the past month this week.

Then, when I went to install some very important new software on my mac, software I use to run all of my web businesses and multimedia and freelance graphic design, it turns out I need to buy a new operating system to run it on my computer. I bought my Mac 2 months before the new operating system came out,and the new software needs the new operating system. Ugh. I can't do anything without it, so that's another $130 out the door.

A friend is also in the hospital, at risk of having her baby 2 months early. She doesn't have anything for the baby yet. So, we're all running around trying to make sure she has the basics should the baby come out soon. We know her hubby will not have the time or energy to shop and set up a nursery. I don't mind that so much, but that is money out earlier than I expected.

I feel like I am swimming against the current. I guess everyone who's trying to save feels like that eventually, right?

I guess I'm not taking all of this in stride as I normally do, because I'm already feeling really down. I missed dad a lot today and the exhaustion of not sleeping and taking care of baby, and trying to keep my career together really got to me today.

17 Responses to “Feeling defeated. And sad.”

  1. boomeyers Says:

    I'm sorry you are feeling low! I hope you feel better soon. Get some rest for sure!

  2. aevans1206 Says:

    We all have those times. It's just a phase. Don't let it get you down. Among all of the other things you've been doing, make sure you take a little time for yourself. Smile

  3. Apprentice Fun-Frugalist Says:

    My best wishes go out to you !! Hope you manage to get some decent sleep soon... help you to recharge the batteries !!

  4. Broken Arrow Says:

    Yikes, your new software actually requires the latest OS?

    I remember those days.

    I love Macs.... Well, still do, but cost is the reason why I personally don't use Macs or Windows at home.

    However, since you are running your business with these software, you may not have a choice so that's a little different.

  5. my english castle Says:

    That first year with baby, I was really ragged. But it does get better. My dad died when my daughter was 5mos old, and it's such a strange combo of emotions--all the parent/child stuff and all your body trying to figure out what's going on again. Get some rest and eat something decent. Maybe a nice glass of wine tonight?

  6. compulsive debtor Says:

    Hope you're having a better day today, Denise. You sound like you just need a break. Try to take some time for you today and don't worry about all the other stuff. It'll all turn out OK -- even your little guy (may he sleep through the night soon....)

  7. Ima saver Says:

    Hope things get better for you quickly!! Rest, if you can.

  8. thriftorama Says:

    MyEnglish Castle. You hit the nail on the head. With the demands of the baby, I really haven't had the time to grieve properly. It just comes out in spurts. Like I'll cry really hard for 5 minutes, wipe the tears, and then get back to work. It's different this time than when I lost my grandparents last year. And of course, I am very sad the bean has lost his coolest grandpa.

    On this backdrop, every obstacle seems bigger, because I feel like "can't the universe just give me a break?"

  9. thriftorama Says:

    BrokenArrow. I have a iMac G5. It's an awesome machine , but it's 4 years old, which is considered a dinosaur these days, so I have to upgrade my OS in order to use my new Adobe Creative Suite 3. I know it will be worthwhile, but I just really was surprised that I had to do this and upset that I have to spend the extra dough. I think I do have a solution.

    so far, Amazon has the cheapest price on the OS. I have a $25 GC for there from credit card rewards and am expecting another soon. The Coinstar machine at my grocery store also will convert your change into an Amazon GC WITHOUT paying the usual fee. So, I'm going to round up the spare change, and use the two gift cards so I can hopefully get my actual cash outlaw to below $50. That makes me feel a little better.

  10. spendinginsocal Says:

    See if you can get things for the baby online! Probably cheaper that way. Good luck with everything... I think things come in waves, and you'll be able to start saving again soon. Your computer was going to go sometime, the baby was going to be born sometime, etc. It's nicer when it's spread out, but it seems like they're still inevitable expenses.

  11. my english castle Says:

    Yeah--everyone thinks grief is a straightforward trajectory too, but it's waves--and sometimes they're just very strong ones. But hang in there--rest and some "me" time to help you feel stronger

  12. Broken Arrow Says:

    Hey Thrifty, I didn't realize all this other stuff that is going on in your life. That or my short-term memory is acting up again. Hehe. Anyway, please take care.

  13. monkeymama Says:

    I know the feeling - this month sucks.

    I am not sure on the exact problem (it's techie) but my spouse just figured out his old Adobe Premier software is not compatible with his new computer (just replaced because it was crashed). He told me it was $600 or something - the software - OMG. Almost as much as the computer we just bought. Not sure what we will do - it can wait, but he can not use his new faster/better system to edit. Figures.

    Anyway, it's just one of those months. I am not feeling alone on the boards (seem like a streak of bad luck has hit many) BUT you are certainly going through much. Hang in there!

  14. thriftorama Says:

    he might be able to find an operating simulator to run his old Adobe on. Like on Macs, they have Classic 9 on new ones so you can run old programs. It's basically a "virtual" operating system.

    Or, maybe he can run down to the community college and get a student version. I've done that before!

  15. monkeymama Says:

    The student version is the $600 one. It's just insanely expensive. Full price is out of the question.

    I will mention the virtual OS thing. Yeah, it is not compatible with Vista - that is the problem. It almost seems it would be more worth it to keep XP for a while.

    I think he is kind of using it as an excuse to upgrade within the year. We are fighting a bit about that. Wink
    I can't complain too much, just terrible timing. My friend worked for Adobe and he got a $1500 or so package for $35. Big Grin & it is 6 years old. Probably time to upgrade and in the big picture we did well.

    I no longer know anyone who works at Adobe. *sigh*

  16. thriftorama Says:

    Oh. Vista. I hate to say it but NOTHING is compatible with Vista. It is a total flop and no other companies have even bothered to make their products and software compatible with it. XP would be your best bet. My hubby is a computer geek and we avoid VIsta at all costs.

  17. Broken Arrow Says:

    Hahah. I avoid Vista at all cost as well. Ok, I admit even if it turned out great, the cost alone would have made me stay away, but that's not the point.

    The sad part is, Vista is packed with a lot of nifty technology, but the sum of its parts is still not compelling enough to make it a must-have among consumers.

    So, that's the trick for them right now. Making it an industry must-have. (And no, ending support for XP is NOT the way to do it, Microsoft!) Or maybe going back to the drawing board and build an optimized OS from scratch, and build it beautifully. Microsoft has the clout to do so, but we'll see.

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