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Work dilemma. Need advice!

August 7th, 2013 at 07:58 am

I just got a call from a wire service I do work for occasionally, asking if I want to cover a trial between Aug 19 and labor day.

Normally, I say yes to this gig all the time, because they pay is awesome: 50 an hour including drive time.

But this time around, I'm not sure. The trial is 3 hours each way drive. And I'll have to be there either 3 or 6 days between aug 19 and labor day. Other than the first day, we do not know which of the other days I will have to be there, and likely won't until the night before. (you never know how trials will go, that is why.)

This is also the week my Kindergartener only has one day of school-- his orientation. And we don't even know which of those days yet until we get a letter from the school.

The next week will be his firs tin kindergarten and he only goes for three hours each day. I'd have to rely on my husband to stop working to take the children so I could be at a courthouse a 6 hour roud trip drive away on a moments notice.

This project could mean 2,000 to 4,000 for my family. I'd REALLY like to have the money, but with all the uncertaintly about which days I'd have to be there -- which makes childcare very difficult to plan-- and it being my son's first week at kindergarten at a new school.

I really am not sure i want to do it. The idea of it is making my head spin, but I'm having money guilt.

What should I do??

17 Responses to “Work dilemma. Need advice!”

  1. creditcardfree Says:

    I know the money sounds good, but with the transition for your son, I think I'd pass. There WILL be other work.

  2. pretty cheap jewelry Says:

    Y'know I am not terrifically sentimental. But many moms are. That said, the first day of Kindergarten being a 'milestone' is a little manufactured ~ kind of like college graduation (alot of people are so exhausted by then they skip it).

    But I did NOT skip my graduation and did NOT let my future husband skip his (we were not married yet at that time). I emphasized to him, that day was what he will remember more than the endless midterms, finals and study nights. And not too many years later, he was glad he went.

    Same with first day of school. I sewed my girl a special sparkly pink poncho to wear the first day of K. She still has it (at 13 years old) and won't let me give it away (remember I am not terrifically sentimental). Our teachers took a picture of each kid and make it part of a memory book to give the parent at the end of the year (your teacher probably will too). You are going to cherish this book.

    This is just the beginning of the scrapbooking phase though, the K teacher will take pics of the many events that year, eg song concerts, Valentine Day, etc.(truthfully it is the parents doing the photo taking and putting together the books). There will be many more photo moments. Therefore, your husband is a good substitute for this first day if you really decide to work.

  3. CB in the City Says:

    I think I would take the job only if I really needed the money. There's an awful lot of uncertainty, and some emotional sacrifice involved.

  4. IndianGal Says:

    That's a tough one. There is the emotional aspect of wanting to be with the child, of course - that might sway the decision one way or the other for you. If you decide to go for the job, is there someone else whom you trust who can hire for a cheaper amount to drop off/pick up the kids and babysit - a neighbor teenager or a friend?

  5. MonkeyMama Says:

    Two Thoughts:

    My first thought, is kind of, "Are you kidding me?" Screw the money. The start of kindergarten is a priceless moment that you can never get back. (& yeah, I am not very sentimental, and it wasn't a big deal for my kids. They weren't emotional about it - very confident and independent types). But I still feel that way. & maybe the drive and all that doesn't sound so great anyway.

    BUT...

    I did have this thought that maybe you should do it because the cash infusion might help you to slow down otherwise. It sounds like a great opportunity as far as working "smarter." I think the thing you need to figure is what your net is after gas and expenses and everything (hotel?). Once you evaluate all that, and the stress on husband's job, maybe it isn't very smart. So, I'd just look at it very critical from that angle. If you could really net $2,000 for a couple of days of work, it's not the end of the world to miss the first day of kinder. I think it depends on you, and your kid, and you just have to be honest with yourself. If you are going to feel guilt forever about it, then it's not worth it. I've always believed in "quality over quantity" with parenting. At the end of the day, will he remember you weren't there for first day of Kinder? If you can then free up more quality time for him? To me, it's kind of just one day.

    I don't envy having to make such a choice, I feel so 50/50, even being emotionally removed.

  6. PNW Mom Says:

    I think unless you REALLY need the money, I would skip it. You can't get those moments back for one thing. Also, I thought you were ready to enter this new phase of your life. Sounds like even though it is short term, it could still be a big commitment for that time period.....especially the driving. Good luck!

  7. ThriftoRama Says:

    It's not that I'm sentimental about the first day of kindergarten.

    it's just that this is yet another transition period for us where our usual routine will be up in the air, and we've had a lot of those in a row, so adding in the stress of a job, plus not knowing what days it is, really ups everyone' stress level.

    I'm just not sure. If we were all in our new routines AND I knew for sure which days I'd have to be there nad when, it would be different, but this gig sounds like a lot of last minute scrambling, plus it's 3 hours drive one way.

  8. pretty cheap jewelry Says:

    One thing I forgot to mention: some kids cry (alot) that day due to the separation. It's kind of crazy the first hour or so in the classroom. If your presence taking him in will translate to 'this is going to be our normal routine' it will make for much smoother future school days.

  9. ceejay74 Says:

    Definitely get your husband's input. If he's confident he can keep up a semblance of a routine while you're on high alert -- and if taking time off won't impact his earning power during that time period -- could be a great way to propel your goals forward quickly. Stressful, but very short-term.

  10. Buendia Says:

    I have these sorts of dilemmas a lot - I am self employed and have an 8-year-old. The money is really important, but I think in this case it isn't just another week of school. At least for my daughter those transitions can be difficult, and it's better if I'm around and the routine is more normal. It's too bad it's not after the school routine starts... but I wouldn't take it in this case.

  11. ThriftoRama Says:

    I'm leaning toward no. I just have money guilt. Hubby says go for it, but it also would be very hard on him.

  12. baselle Says:

    I can see where the money is helpful, but I'd pass. There's more to life than the grind of pulling down bucks from every opportunity. Even if you aren't sentimental and the kids aren't sentimental, just being there and your kids seeing that you are there for them is emotional money in the bank.

    There will be other chances; it reads like you have a relationship with the payee and they will ask you again.

  13. LuckyRobin Says:

    Have you asked what your kiddo wants? Because I would think that is the primary factor. Some kids are cool and confident and it would be no big deal. Other kids would freak at the idea. They want Mom.

  14. ThriftoRama Says:

    Really guys, it's not the sentiment. It's the lack of childcare at the end of August!

  15. ThriftoRama Says:

    I turned it down, and frankly, I feel relieved.

  16. pretty cheap jewelry Says:

    YAY! lots of help in these comments, I love to read!

  17. wowitsawonderfullife Says:

    Great decision! You had a choice and you picked the one that worked.

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